inksplashes | (no subject)

[ It never hurts to have a full contact list, even if it's touch-and-go relations. Sometimes, a job just goes more smoothly with a friendly face around. But the problem is making sure said face is also a good shot, a competent human being, et cetera and whatnot.

Their smaller jobs went down smoothly enough, and this seems like a good progression to test the waters. On whatever space-email expy it is they all use: ]

got a free afternoon? i hear leith is great these days.

[ It'll probably take longer than that, but this is easier to agree to. ]

[ Good shot? Check. Competent human being? Check. Good human being?

Well, he can act it, but that's fortunately not on the checklist.

Lavi doesn't respond to the message for a while, because like any dedicated scholar and wandering warrior, he's been spending most of the day lounging in the Scarback library and discussing the merits of consciousness.

In other words, he just woke up. ]

Leith is okay. Not enough hot girls. Mostly guys in robes.

[ This would probably make more sense if he clarified "I'm already on Leith and at the monastery," but you never know, he could also be in a robe shop that exclusively staffs other men. Lavi has certainly shown up in weirder places. ]

So yeah I'm free. Got a warrant or just feeling lonely?

[ Ah yes, the fine and ancient art of napping. He's about ready to hit up another name when he gets the notification. Of which he agrees, naturally—scarbacks are often not the most fun skirts to chase. Alas. ]

i had a warrant, but if you'd rather just keep me company...

[ ;) ;) ;) ]

or does a drug bust sound romantic enough for you?

[ In a rare moment of helpfulness, he'll even attach the warrant info. ]

[ Oh, you know just how to get a guy all hot and bothered, Lancer. Doing the prerequisite checks with his partner, which means checking to see that Kanda is breathing and still at normal levels of surly, Lavi shoots back another reply. ]

I'll bring the hokk, you bring the ammo. Where we heading or is that part of the fun?

[ Hot and bothered and with the threat of death and dismemberment—he's a generous dude. ]

funny you should mention that. pretty sure it's a hokkery.

[ A (relatively) refined cover for something less innocent. ]

they had a pretty bad explosion last week in one of their silos. [ Grain elevators bursting into nothing is one thing, but last he heard that wasn't too common a feature of fancy Leithian dispensaries. ] worth checking out, hm? if it's a dud lead, we'll just get a drink and go.

[ How about it. ]

[ Either way this sounds like Lavi is going to get away from dudes in robes (as much as the scholastic side of him appreciates the monastery, he could use less chanting and bleeding at this point) and get a drink in the process, so how could he possibly say no? ]

Sounds good, but if you show up in gold, I'm out.

[ He's gonna show up in gold just to be sarcastic, isn't he? The RAC seems to only accept agents based on their propensity to be terrible. Sigh. ]

Need me to build us credentials or did your broker hook you up?

What flies when it’s born, lies when it’s alive, and runs when it’s dead?

[ He doesn't even say hello or anything SOLVE THE DAMN RIDDLE. ]

Politicians?

[ "Your mom."

aka why are you sending him random questions...? ]

Is there something you need?

How would a politician run if they're dead?

I need you to answer this.

By not actually being dead in the first place.

[ Cynicism +3 ]

A snowflake. Don't you have servants for this, Crow-chan? ;3

Ah! You're right, you're so smart.

You're saying this like you're not one by a small degree?

It wasn't very hard..

And yep, that's exactly what I'm saying. See, you're smart too.

That's because I picked a simple one.

[ A simple one he couldn't get smh. ]

Anyway.

How far can a dog run into the woods?

[ why are you still talking though like

stop

now ]

Are you lonely or something? They have a service for that, you know.

[ stop acting like you don't love him ]

Maybe. I've had little interaction in the past couple of years with men.

[ let's call it method-acting. so method he's soulbonded to it. ]

uhhh... I thought we covered how I'm not your type...I mean there are services for that too...

Wait.

What kind of service were you talking about?

[ He's not an airhead, but because he's pretty much set on one track he didn't quite realize what Lavi was implying. ]

I'm not interested in those kinds of services.

I mean I literally have not spoken to a man in years.

Riiiiiight....

[ He'd ask why but that'd imply wanting to know anything remotely personal and he's mostly just trying to get this guy to stop talking, not encourage him further. ]

Try an uncle then. They love to talk in riddles.

And the answer is halfway before they're running out.

[ i hate that lavi is too scholastic not to answer with a pun about bark instead ]

I'm not a believer so I'd much rather not.

Besides I have you to answer them.

[ Even if he's obviously reluctant. From Crowley's perspective it's easy to ring an answer out of him. ]

Are you familiar with riddles like these?

Belief in someone isn't necessary to talk to them, Crowcrow.

[ After all, he's talking to you...?! ]

Little bit, yeah, but they're mostly just easy...

I just don't want to talk to one of them, Lala.

[ Anyway. ]

Then tell me one.

Sure, try this.

What goes away if I stop talking to it?

That sounds like something my servants think whenever you're around.

[ He's not answering honestly, but genuinely speaking that's what he believes. ]

[ Nope, not even rising to that.

but a+ nice comeback.

now try to figure out the answer. ]

[ He knows the answer but this is Crowley. He's both half dumb and half asshole. ]

Yu-chan? Man you really wanna hurt that poor guys feelings.

[ seriously, crowley

get some friends

friends that aren't named lavi ]

Nevermind, apparently you keep talking anyway. :(

Edited 2017-01-15 06:32 (UTC)

[ Jokes on you Lavi, you're the last to the reply. You're still talking.

(He'll be back in like a week or whatever love you lots bestie.) ]

lavi

hey

lavi

your partners drunk come get him

do you know what time it is kara

no

past my bedtime

is he trying to kill someone important

no but

i onyl have 1 bed and i dont share

fine

send me the address

i'll be there in a few

[address attached]

þokk

[Kara don't slip into Old Norse just because you're drunk.]

[ when an info broker just randomly throws out a dead language, you'd think a student of history would .. you know, reply, but he doesn't.

and after thirty minutes, he's.. still not there.

call and check on him? or just make sure yu's personal uber is still en route, whatever. ]

[It takes her a little while to actually realize that time has passed and he still isn't here, but finally she manages]

lavi

lavi where are you

lavi

you get mugged?

hey asshole

[ A minute or two passes before he responds. ]

Sorry

I'm outside

Trying to help someone but I can't find them

[ "Someone" sounds cooler than kittens. ]

(no subject)

dec week 2, day 3? ish? how does dating even work

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wheezes lala is one of the saddest parts of dgm hdu

I DIDN'T KNOW LMAO

H. D. U.

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